Handling Difficult Employee Conversations with Confidence

Handling difficult conversations with employees can be one of the toughest challenges for HR professionals and hiring managers. However, with the right approach, these discussions can lead to positive outcomes and improved performance. In this edition, we’ll explore proven strategies to navigate tough conversations with confidence, ensuring a more productive and engaged workforce.

Utilize This Strategy to Guide Difficult Conversations with Employees Not Meeting Expectations

As a human resources professional or hiring manager, managing difficult conversations with employees is a critical part of fostering an effective and productive work environment. These discussions should be grounded in an understanding of human behavior to ensure they do not provoke defensiveness or resistance from the employee. Every HR professional or manager, at some point, must address situations where an employee’s performance falls below expectations. Even within high-performing teams, such scenarios are common and can be challenging to navigate. Often, despite a manager’s belief that their expectations were clear, these discussions can quickly turn emotionally charged and unproductive.

The goal of any performance-related conversation should be a clear understanding of the desired outcome from both the employee and employer perspectives. HR professionals and managers frequently find themselves balancing between a collaborative approach and the potential for confrontation. To aid in this delicate balance, there is a proven method that consistently yields more positive results when addressing difficult conversations in the workplace.

When engaging in a tough conversation with an employee, you might encourage managers or yourself to start with the phrase: “The story I have in my head is … Can we discuss that?” Here’s why this approach works effectively:

1. Framing Feedback as Perception, Not Fact:

Drawing on techniques from counseling, using “I” statements to start feedback frames the discussion as a personal perspective rather than an accusation. This approach helps reduce the employee’s feeling of being confronted, making it more likely they will engage in an open and constructive dialogue.

2. Encouraging Employee Autonomy Through Conversation:

One of the key drivers of employee engagement and motivation is autonomy, or the sense of having control over one’s decisions and actions. When an employee feels their autonomy is being undermined—whether overtly or subtly—defensiveness often surfaces. This can manifest as resistance, emotional withdrawal, or a confrontational attitude, none of which are conducive to achieving a positive resolution.

It is crucial for HR professionals and managers to handle these situations delicately, ensuring that they do not unintentionally infringe on an employee’s sense of emotional autonomy. Even when presenting objective evidence of underperformance, it’s more effective to engage the employee in a conversation that respects their autonomy. By framing observations as “a story” or personal interpretation of the situation, rather than a concrete judgment, you create space for the employee to express their perspective. This collaborative approach fosters a more open and productive dialogue.

When navigating difficult discussions in the workplace, always maintain a focus on the desired outcome. Whether it’s improving performance, retaining a motivated employee, or driving better results, this approach is designed to promote productive resolutions while maintaining an employee’s sense of dignity and autonomy. HR professionals and hiring managers can guide these conversations to ensure they are constructive, supportive, and aligned with the overall goals of the organization.

Conclusion

In summary, handling difficult conversations with employees is a vital skill for HR professionals and hiring managers. By framing feedback as a personal perspective and fostering autonomy, you can turn challenging discussions into opportunities for growth and improved performance. Keep these strategies in mind to ensure your conversations are both constructive and aligned with your organizational goals.

Kevin Mero, CEO, JobRx
kevin@jobrx.com
(210) 872-6160